How Old is Too Old???

     I am in wonderment at the moment.....and I wonder if I am too old to start something new?  As I am still on the idea of discovering who I am, I have been looking around at amazing women, whom I admit I didn't see their amazing-ness at first.  That is probably from societal conditioning.  I won't rant about that now to ruin the mood, but you probably understand the point anyway....if not let me know and I will gladly rant in another posting!

     As I was saying, I have met quite a few women recently that are doing things for themselves that are absolutely inspiring!  There are even people on my friends list on Facebook ,whom, upon closer inspection are not the people I packaged them up to be, dig a little deeper and I learn that old friends and new ones are singers, artists, photographers, talented cake designers/decorator/bakers, actors, comedienne's, dancers, fashion designers, lingerie designers, yoga instructors, graphic designers, body builders, models.....i am telling you the list goes on and on!

     And now here I am, having let my life slip by and while telling others to "grab the Bull by the balls" and I didn't heed my own advice.  I am happy to be married with children.  As you already know from my previous posts; my search does not lay in my family life, it lies in my personal life.  Yes, there is a difference, a complicated woman can understand the difference.  It is the search to make me fulfilled and happy, as a happy Mommy means everyone else in the house is happy too!

     So, I now ask this again....Am I too old to start something?  What should that something be?

     I was never confident in myself when I was younger to follow through with my own singing career.  I never felt that I was fantastic enough (note that I didn't say good enough).  Then I didn't follow through with being the sculptor that I was becoming, in fact of all the pieces that I had in my collection, only three remain, and one of them was never finished.  I never followed through with my dream of being an actress, either.  High school was as far as I pursued that dream. 

     Then there's the novel.  I have a character and I have a segment that I have tried to work with to make a story that I have started 30-40 different ways, never to feel it was the right way; all written over the past 8 years.  Yet again, another case of no follow through. And let's not talk about the business ventures that I have started and failed!   I am seeing a really bad trend here.

     I think that I can use this trend in other areas of my life as well to a hugely shameful degree...Ugh!  Never mind calling this post How old is too old???  I should call it Am I Stupid or What!! 

    Well, now that I have shredded myself a little, I have to pick up the pieces and cart them around with me....where shall I go??  What shall I do?  I am still left without answers, but hopefully, I will get there soon enough....time's a wastin!